What is self sabotage?
It is defined as “any behavior, thought, emotion or action that holds you back from getting what you want consciously. It is the conflict that exists between conscious desires and unconscious wants”.
It not only prevents you from reaching your goal, but becomes a default safety mechanism where you stay in your comfort zone to protect you from harm. Your brain does it to you, thinking it knows what is best. If we don’t do something about it, we continue to live our regrets with no life rather than living a life with no regrets.
It comes in various forms. Fear of failure, fear of success, fear of taking risks, inability to think critically or flexibly. The list can go on. It boils down to limiting thoughts, such as “This wont work.” “I can’t do this.” “I’m too busy right now.” “I’m just not good enough. ”
The problem is that all of these patterns have consequences. Some are obvious, while others are more subtle.
In order to change our patterns and eliminate these destructive ways, it takes effort. Massive amounts of effort. Effort is the child of desire, so there has to be a desire to change.
- Learn from Mistakes.
- Think Bigger and Bolder
- Ask Better Questions (of yourself): “What have I learned from this?” “What would I do differently?”
- Use change as an experiment: Change doesn’t happen overnight. If you treat it as an experiment and as a process, you just might accept that in the end, you can win this war.
- Focus on Solutions
You are in control of this, whether you know it or not. YOU hold the pin to the grenade. Make a personal decision to get what you want and stop talking yourself out of amazing things!